As in all negotiations, start with more than what you want, and settle on something as close to what you want as you can, within unfair, anti-man family court limitations. I let them go freely during the week if they want to see their father, but any time I ask to spend time with them during the weekend, he makes other plans for them. His ex wife to be is a constant pain in the you know what, actually shes crazy, aggressive, loves making a drama and at the moment she really doesn't like me. Their relationship was awful, she left him 3 times having numerous affairs and each time he took her back for the kids, 2 boys 16 and 15. Last time I tried, she called 911 and said I was attacking her and I had to get inside my house and lock the door. Yes now she obviously wants to get her hands on his money. She then would tag my husband in posts about her breasts and other inappropriate things.
Therefore, please use this technique responsibly and ethically. I keep my mouth pretty shut — I know that given her facade, no one who knows her will believe everything I say, and it will just make me look nuts. When I am done wrong I make it a point to not let it go and do the simular done to me. For more Mind Control attraction and emotional enslavement! TryingMyBest--his son is not your boy. She was the one who had an affair.
My boyfriend of 10 months has an ex-wife who is completely insane! God is the only one who should seek vengeance. But she still wants to drag me in. I very much loved that they never told anyone I was their step child. It's come down to being a control issue, and I need to learn to just ignore her manipulation and degrading comments and not fight every battle. Acceptance that you cannot control the ex-wife and all the venom that she spews is the first step. I recently began dating someone whose Ex served Divorce Papers last year. Even though he married you, he is still unsure if he wants to let her go.
And never openly criticize your ex in front of your kids. Yes, I do put responsibility on him, and I would like nothing more for him to take this and move forward with this himself. Believe me the girls will know were the drama is actually coming from as they get older, they are just starting to realize it know. I am trying to not let it lead my life but some times i cant help it : do i go for coffee and we hear each other out but not trust her? His daughter is a responsible and successful person and we need to treat her that way. Baby mama dramas may keep much of America entertained thanks to the countless daytime talk shows, but when you are caught in the middle of one it is far from entertaining. If you really want to help: Ask what she can eat and cook for her and the boys and have your husband take it to their house, as a first step.
Also I want to say I love my husband with all my heart. It has somewhat slowed her down, but I still deal with it. If they than you, you criticize. Any adult who blames others for his or her behavior obviously has issues of their own. I know you love your boyfriend, and you want the best for him. Every time there is a disagreement between mom and I, or between dad and her mom and she finds out about it, which she is almost 9 now and smart enough to pick up on things, I never get anything from her but attitude, eye rolls and kicked to the curb. May you be pleasantly surprised with the discussion and decisions that are made.
We refuse to communicate with her or him by phone or email unless there's an emergency with one of the girls. All complaints about me on that front stopped. And will charm the pants of anyone, all whilst letting people think she is the victim and I am the evil aggressive controlling perpetrator. My husbands ex is called sister in law by his siblings. Find out when you can step in, how you can help, and what situations or topics involving the children will be off-limits to you as a stepparent. So I do know both sides. I can't fight the ex-wife and mother in law.
Copyright ©2014 Bonus Families, Inc. You guys have absolutely nothing you must discuss that is outside of those kids. We have been on and off trying to be civil and for a few months we actually got on quite well, she would involve me with the children's arrangements, although she has always been the one messing it about and changing her mind of when my partner can see them, it has never been consistent, and after all that's what kids need right? However, every time you get into a spat with your ex, you are giving them exactly what they want: your undivided attention. And I think without him taking charge finally and telling her to bug off when she tried to interfere, I would have left long ago. When we try to talk to them their mother somehow loses their phones and says we have to earn her trust if we want to talk to them again. It was her way or she lied and cheated to get her way. Keep letting her do this and I will let her have her way.
Every time the case gets dismissed and there is one less lawyer she can use because she lies to all of them. But I let it go even though I thought it was odd. Just these two things will support you to begin to move through to the peace that comes from accepting that your life is changing, the people in your life are moving on, and sometimes whether we want to or not, we are changing and moving on, too. And my husband has to supervise it. Enough to buy a beautiful townhouse although 45 mins away from our house and the kids school car, and live off of spousal and child support without working.
So, does this sound like you? As difficult as it is to accept, anything to do with the child is between your boyfriend and his former partner. She uses her child too hurt my husband as nothing else works anymore. Broke up, went our separate ways. Mine has made me physically and emotionally ill. If not, perhaps purchasing enough underwear, toothbrushes and inexpensive outfits like sweats to get them through the weekend. Since then things were ok he said she would get better. He owns his own house, has a good job, pays his child support on time every time and has never been in trouble with the law.